Fair Time in TN!!

It is almost that time of year again here in East TN. Courtney and I are both lucky enough to get to work the fair this year. That extra bit of money will certainly help us out with our sweet baby girl on the way!!

September is chock full of activities. I think once October is here we will take a deep breath and be glad we made it through!!

Let me just list it all out, because I can :)

Labor Day (This weekend): Family Reunion 2013
September 4: 1st of two baby appointments.
September 6-15: TN Valley Fair!!
September 18: I will try to keep my appts on the same day of the week, so 2nd baby appointment.
September 21: All day Birthing/New Parent Class/Hospital Tour. Our friend is also surprising us by decorating our nursery while we are out all day. :)
September 22: 1st Baby Shower!! Friends.
September 26: Breastfeeding Class.
September 29: 2nd Baby Shower!! Family/Church ladies.

Then we get into October...we have one more evening natural birthing class on the 1st, then we are in the home stretch to meeting this sweet baby of ours!! We will have weekly appointments until she is born during October too. I also have an eye doctor appointment in there somewhere.

I am getting more achy, and this heartburn is no joke. It is harder to stay asleep through the night, getting up to pee and switching sides after one goes numb and readjusting the pillows haha. I try to get up and walk more at work too, to keep the blood moving. Oh yeah!! The last time I updated, I was awaiting results from the sugar test, I am soooo happy to say I passed :) I am free to party on as I was before! Thank goodness because bread and ice cream are about the only things that don't set my chest on fire :)

I have been nesting at work. Getting everything ready for go time! I have even typed up my list of emergency numbers in case I go into active labor while I am working. I have also started our Birth Plan...knowing with these classes I will probably learn more and make some changes. The nesting on the home front hasn't started yet for me. I think once we get the nursery finished it will be easier for me to get into that groove. Courtney will more than likely do most of the cleaning while she is bored during the days...which is fine. I just hope I don't get antsy and want to do some myself.

The first girl from the Fall Pregnancy board on Baby Center had her baby yesterday, you know how that goes! We are going to start falling like dominos now....I think there were only about 10 other active ladies in front of us, so this time is going to fly by!

Until next time, I'm gonna eat some pop tarts :)

Gay Marriage in TN?

I will be 29 weeks tomorrow, that means we will be one week away from 30 weeks!!! Then only a mere 10 weeks from our due date! I really can't believe time is passing by so quickly. I am waiting to hear back from my 3 hour glucose test...that's right, I failed the 1 hour glucose test. :( Obviously, I hope to pass it and can continue to enjoy my pasta and other carbs :) Other than that, everything is looking great with baby girl and I am feeling pretty good too! I am starting to get a little more tired earlier in the evening, but I haven't hit my 8:00 bedtime again yet. I'm sure that's right around the corner.

Another thing I hope passes...

I read something this morning...an article from a little news magazine here in Knoxville. Let me link it. Take a minute to read it, it is very short. Gay Marriage in Tennessee? I am trying not to overreact here, but this is huge. Like, huge. While I know it still has to be appealed, I can't help but remind myself how difficult it is going to be for this case to be denied. If they try to take what they've already granted away from this couple, we have Prop 8 all over again. If they try to deny other couples the same thing they've already granted this couple, we have DOMA all over again.

Why does a case in Ohio matter for Tennessee? We are in the same Circuit of Appeals...along with Michigan and Kentucky. What is granted for one state through the Circuit of Appeals applies to the other states in that same circuit...so if the 6th Circuit Court approves that gay marriages from other states be recognized in Ohio, they also approve it for Tennessee.

Now, I am trying to find when the next court session is scheduled and I am going to watch like a hawk. This is going to be fun.

Courtney and I have just talked about taking a quick trip to NYC over my maternity leave to get a marriage license. We want to be armed and ready when it is time for this to become the new law of the land :) I am also very very excited, TN doesn't require a home study for spouses or stepparents....Courtney will be my spouse. That cuts about half of the adoption costs for us!!

I told her just a few minutes ago..."thank goodness you lost your job!" Had she not we would have already started to pay for the home study. Money that we most likely wouldn't get back. Now it is going to be unnecessary...we may have to wait a little while longer, but it will be worth it to be treated like a normal couple.

This is going to be good. I am ready for all of this to play out. All in time :)

The Struggle Is Real(er)?..

Courtney speaking again..

So, for those of you who don't know, which is all of you.. I work from home. I was living in Chattanooga and Jamie was living in Knoxville when we met. As our relationship progressed we decided to move in together and, given that Jamie has a home and a supportive family and I had neither, I made the move to Knoxville. I was up front with my place of employment and they decided that I was an asset that they did not want to lose so they set me up with a work from home position here.

Fast forward to this Tuesday. My manager (administrator really, but she's in charge of me, but not the one who decides my fate) casually mentions she'll be in town previous to Tuesday and on Tuesday she texts me and asks if she can stop by while she's in the area. I said yes and she comes over to chit chat, I presumed. We made our way to my "office" and she sits down and sighs and has this face that shows an uncomfortable smile and I immediately knew why she was there. The big boss woman in charge had sent her there to let me know that they no longer needed me. I knew there was an issue because recently they had discussed losing money, but since I had been there the longest out of all the office staff and I know what I'm doing I didn't think they would let me go. Not to mention this other little thing... WE HAVE A BABY ON THE WAY! Excuse my French, but what in the hell could they be thinking?! I mean seriously.. who fires someone who has a baby on the way?? Now apparently I was to be told that I did have the option to either commute to Chattanooga (that comes up to 1000 miles a week, people) WITHOUT mileage reimbursement or any pay increase whatsoever OR no big deal.. I could stay in Chattanooga Monday through Friday to save the gas and be able to be in the office. Yeah let me just remind you again that we have a baby on the way. If I can help it I'm not going to choose to be living in another city when my first child could decide to come early. No thank you.

I am honestly thinking that the only reason working in Chattanooga was given as an option was so that they could use that to fight paying me unemployment. Not cool, but totally something that the main person in charge would do. As for the manager who had the pleasure of being told to meet with me, she said that the decision maker said "She's smart. She'll find another job." Yeah that makes me feel a lot better. So they have given me until August 23rd to work out my time with them. It's funny because a previous employee who was fired for doing absolutely no work when she was at work was given a month to get it together and was offered a severance package, but I get a 2.5 week notice and a "you're smart." To me that's pretty close to an eff you. Smart isn't going to put diapers on our baby's butt or food in her mouth. Fortunately if I can find another decent paying job or get unemployment we will be just ok financially, definitely not anywhere fantastic, but I am just so peeved by this woman's lack of understanding for my situation. She is in her 40s I believe and she has no children, has never wanted any and within the past decade was married. Work is her child and I'm sure that's why she has room to be so heartless, because the company is her baby and she had to save it. It just absolutely blows my mind that a person can, with no regard, eliminate somebody's paycheck when they have a baby due soon. November is not that far away and she may not even wait that long to meet us.

All of this came as a shock, not to mention I have never received any warnings or reprimand, verbal or written, stating that my work has been unsatisfactory or anything of that nature. It's just complete BS. So accordingly I sent an email stating that I would like to hold onto my position until closer to when Sophia is due that way I can end my job there, take time to be with my family, then return to work. For those of you who live in the south, you can imagine how easy it would be, not to mention how well you would be received, if you were to apply for a new job and say "Hey by the way, employer in Tennessee, very shortly into my time with you I would like to take 2-5 days off to be with my newborn baby that my lesbian partner is delivering." Yeah I mean people can surprise us, but that's not something I particularly want to even deal with.

So there is my vent session for the evening. I have been letting the amount of disrespect I have been fed stew for the past two days so I had to get it all out.

Oh hey not to mention some of this stress was brought on by upcoming adoption procedures. We finally got ahold of a lawyer and an agency willing to do work with us regarding the adoption. We will owe about $4000 in fees and half of the paperwork from the agency that will process the second parent adoption wants to know about employers and bills and salaries, etc. So this is just the perfect time. They couldn't have planned it better really.

But lets end on a positive note. I didn't LOVE my job and it certainly wasn't making me the bread winner of the family so maybe this is a chance for me to move onto something that pays better or something that I enjoy more. Jamie has been so supportive even though I feel like a complete loser, but she knows what I'm worth and she has been here to support me all the way. Fingers crossed for better things coming our way!!


:)

Letter To Sophia

Dear Sophia,

This is your momma here. At least I think that is what I'll be called...you can pick when the time is right. I wanted to write you a letter so I will be able to remember some of the amazing moments of this pregnancy so far. According to my What To Expect app, you are about the size of a head of cauliflower...or close to 16 inches and about 2.5lbs. No wonder this belly of mine feels so stretched out!! You are 27 weeks and 4 days old. That means in just over 12 weeks we will be able to hold you outside of my belly!

You are so strong. From the first days and weeks we learned you were growing, the numbers were through the roof...we actually thought there might be more than one baby growing, but it was always just our super strong girl! You are not afraid to show me and your mom all the moves you have learned so far. We especially love your nightly performances...sometimes you are so active we are sure you are just going to push your way right into our arms!

I really enjoy our special morning time together while your mom is still sleeping, and I am not ready to get up for the day, you and I just hang out...well I hang out. It feels like you may be prepping for a marathon some mornings. It is so wonderful to share that time with you. I sometimes wonder if you are going to be this active on the outside, if so we are in for it!

We had a 3D ultrasound of you a couple weeks ago. You are so beautiful. I hope I never forget to tell you just how beautiful you are. I hope your mom and I remember the way we talk about ourselves is the way you will, too, think one day...and that we remind each other we are beautiful even on our worst days.

You are so loved. I can't even begin to explain the love we have for you. Not to mention all of our friends and family who simply can't wait to meet this special girl of ours! We planned and prepared and waited for you to come to us, when the timing was right. Oh my goodness the timing was impeccable too. I will be sure to tell you all the stories I can remember of your great-grandma. You are actually due on her birthday, I think she had a hand in aligning the stars to bring you into our lives. She was never a shy lady...she liked to show off on her birthdays, I bet you are her biggest show yet! I know she loves you so very much too. I can't wait to wrap you up in one of the blankets she made just for you.

I can't wait to meet you. I often wonder what your personality will be like. I wonder if you and I will have the same bond that my mom and I share. I wonder if you will be just as outspoken as me...your mom is going to be in trouble if that's the case :) You are already so exciting and you keep me on my toes, especially on the days you decide to pretend my bladder is a trampoline! I have no doubt you and your mom have a special bond nobody else understands. She has taken such good care of both of us while you are growing. She can't wait to meet you either. You already have our hearts with yours. The day we get to meet you is going to be the very best day of our lives.

There is so much more I want to say to you, but one day you will probably want a baby of your own...and if you decide to carry that baby in your belly, you will notice your brain slowly scattering all over the place...all that to say, I can't remember everything I wanted to say when I started this letter to you. Hopefully when you are here with us on the outside I will have things more together!

I love you my sweet baby girl. I hope you never feel like you need to question that.

Love,
Your Momma.

P.S. The first few weeks will be a totally new experience for your moms, don't hold that against us...we will do the very best we can :)